My Secret Pain

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You hold my hand
You move my sleeve
You see my dirty secret
My nighttime reprieve

You look at me
In the eye
And see that I’m
About to cry

You move your hand
Close to my heart
And promise we’ll never
Be apart

Why is it
I can’t believe
What you say
Is not to deceive-

Me in my
Fragile state
These feelings
I must debate

Is this truth
Is this real
Is this how you
Honestly feel

Or is this false
Is it all lies
To keep the tears
From leaving my eyes

You know my secret
It’s out at last
Now you know
My hidden past

Can you love me
For who I am
Can you live
With what I can-

Do to myself
Without second thought
It’s been so long
That I’ve fought-

This war with pain
My secret strife
To at last
End my life

You say you love me
Is it true
If so, what do you
Plan to do-

To keep me away
From my best friend
So hard and cold
And sharp on the end

He gives me such pleasure
Every night
He gives me a rush
And he takes my fright

I feel the pain
I see the red
Tonight at last
Will I be dead

Then I remember
I have you; my love
This brings me back
From up above

I make it through
The night again
Maybe tomorrow
Maybe then

No! You will see
I will make it through
Because I know
I will wake up to seeing
“Beautiful, I love you”

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