Like years ago
I’m standing here
Leaning on the rail of this old porch
And the memories burn
Within my mind
Like flames of a brilliant torch

I see the remains
Of yesterday
And things that used to be
I recall mistakes
That I once made
They’ve never stopped haunting me

The little toys
Which once brought joy
Sit inside looking cold
They remind me of
A time gone by
When I felt I’d never grow old

A broken chair
Stands on three legs
A puzzle, never done
Time forgot them both
As it has forgot
A little boy in the summer sun

Now, like the toys
He stands alone
And the sun has gone away
But the memories
Keep coming out
As if saved for a rainy day

And little children
Playing in the snow
With a hole in every glove
Have been lost in time
But a dim fire burns
As if for a long lost love

And the old pond
Where we slid on ice
Has dried up years ago
The cows no longer
Quench thirst there
And high the weeds have grown

Now I look across
The old dirt road
And across the distant land
For miles I see
The empty fields
Where wood thickets used to stand

But the trees are gone
They gave up life
They were fell and burned away
And I hold a hope
Within my heart
That they’ll return someday

This little valley
Once seemed so big
But now it seems so small
And the town which once
Seemed far away
Seems now not far at all

Oh, the memories
Of yesterday
Come cutting like a knife
They bring back all
The bits and the pieces
That were forgotten in my life

A pile of clothes
In my old room
Sits in a closet all alone
They have no one
To play in them
For the little boy is grown

The tiles are yellowed
The walls have faded
And far away I’ve roamed
But no matter how far
I may journey away
This place is always home

And in my old room
An old bed still stands
My parents left it there
I walk through the door
And I see the past
As I breathe familiar air

This old house
Holds a lot of memories
Some were bad and some were good
And when Mom & Dad said
“Son, remember us”
I never really understood

You see, they knew of time
And of how it passes
And they told me to beware
“For memories will
Betray you, Son
And all will be changed here”

With my little cousins
Out in the yard
For hours we would play
Now time has passed
And I know them not
For we’ve gone our separate ways

Now I stand out here
In the evening sun
And I feel the summer breeze
And it blows warm
Across my face
And helps set my soul at ease

And yet still I see
The rustic remains
Of what life use to be
In my soul I wish
That for just one night
Time would bring it all back to me

The little games
We played as kids
We thought it would always last
Deep in my heart
I ask the clock
Why did the years go so fast

Well, my Mom and Dad
They are changed too
Time has taken them apart
And as their marriage died
Deep inside of me
Died a little piece of my own heart

In the little town
Where I ran around
With my friends in search of fun
There is no one left
That I once knew
They’ve grown up and they’ve all gone

In the town where I once
Knew everyone
So very few have remained
And I can’t help but wonder
Wherever they are
If they’re feeling the same pain

I look around me now
I see the old place
And what the years have done to it
And as I think of all
The years yet to come
Inside, I must tremble a bit

For I can’t help but wonder
As time goes on
And as age changes its face
When I come back home
In another time
Will I still recognize the old place?

Will time change it so
That these old hills
And all that is around
Seems strange to me
Will I think of it
As just another little town

And all of us kids
When school was cancelled
Would ride sleds across the snow
As I look around
I ask myself
Where did all those children go?

Are they lost in time
Are they gone for good
Why must we all grow old
If I shed a tear
For the children gone
Would it be considered too bold

Time has taken us all
So very far away
From each other and from our home
And rarely we return
To see one another
And the hills we use to roam

And I wonder why
When I left this place
In my heart I felt so glad
Only to return
After years had passed
And in my heart to feel so sad

But as much as things
May change with time
As it has changed from the start
This home of mine
Will always have
A very special place in my heart

And when all is lost
When all have died
Or when they’ve all left me
I’ll look up to the Heavens
And say “Thank you, Lord
For giving me…My memories”

Tonight I’ve heard
A memory
An echo from the past
It’s now but just
A tiny glow
The flame no longer lasts

I’ve heard it once
Some years ago
The time I do not know
And now it’s echoed
Back at me
After I have grown so old

A memory
Of happy times
Comes out from inner space
I’m sure that all
‘Twas in this room
Could see it in my face

My heart was filled
With such a joy
But then so quickly gone
That though this room
Was overfilled
Its occupants where but one

For just a moment
I was there
Just I from wall to wall
And though these people
Are my friends
I know them not at all

My story is somewhat
Of a simple one
Of it I’m sure you know
I was born here
In this small town
And slowly I did grow

And now my mind
Begins to recall
Memories from throughout the years
And I fight myself
So very hard
To try to hold back the tears

I recall the days
Of summer youth
And of running in the sun
Of chasing girls
Pulling ponytails
And staying up ‘til One

The swimming hole
And climbing trees
Of playing Kick the Can
Of playing House
And tire swings
And my best friend named Stan

I recall a shanty
Old run down home
Sitting by a dusty road
It’s where I lived
A lifetime ago
When I was just a boy

The house we had built
Painted a rustic picture
Set deep in a pine wood glade
My mind recalls
The years spent there
And the memories that were made

But summer games
Can be played no more
There is no yelling and no cheers
No Fourth of July
No fireworks
Just an old man with eyes of tears

For that little boy
He is no more
He’s died and gone away
For time brings age
And a man is born
From the boy of yesterday

And when the man is born
The boy must die
Oh, in his heart it still remains
But he can not run
And jump and shout
And pitch rocks against window pains

And now a memory
Of a Christmas Day
Comes out from within my brain
‘Twas the only Christmas
I can recall
Upon which…it rained

I recall the look
On my Mothers face
And look of hope and yet despair
For looking under-
Neath the tree
You could not see much there

It was a hard year
For my Parents
A year of hard work and of tries
I recall my Mother
Looking for a sign
In each of her little eyes

Well, my Mother looked
As if she had died
And in spirit she had indeed
She wanted to make this
A happy day
For her children so in need

And she wanted to tell us
That it was not the gifts
But the love we shared that day
She wanted to hold us
In her arms and cry
But my Mother knew not the way

So she held it back
She painted on a smile
But her eyes just could not hide
The wonderful love
The terrible fear
And how hard she cried inside

She was so afraid
The gifts we had
Would not be loved by each of us
Afraid that we’d feel sad
That we’d feel as if
She had violated our trust

But the little presents
That we had
One another for to give
We loved them so
I’ll not forget
In as long as I might live

And looking back now
On that Christmas day
One thing is clear to me
The greatest gift
I’ve yet received
Was love, beneath the tree

Well, I go back home now
When I can
And I see the empty place
Then I hear the voice
Of everyone
Coming out from inner space

I stand there in
The empty rooms
And I stare at faded walls
I see the ghosts
Of years gone by
And I hear the hallowed calls

They call me back
To a time gone by
And generations that are gone
They ran a race
That most call “time”
In the end the clock had won

Then I see the faces
Of yesteryears
Of family members that are no more
They’ve left this Earth
And they’ve sailed away
To a far and distant shore

And it hurts me so
That they’re all gone
With them I can no longer be
Now I’m all alone
Here in the room
With strangers surrounding me

And now a memory
Of a woman’s laugh
So heartfelt and so gay
My mind tells me
I heard that laugh
Upon…my wedding day

After times of laugh
And times of love
Times of hard work and of tears
I wonder why
I most recall
Her laugh after all these years

We shared a life
Of good and bad
We lived it side by side
And we loved each other
All the more
As we began our downhill slide

To my sweet wife
Whom I have known
And have loved so many years
I lay my head back
And I rest
On a pillow filled with tears

It’s filled with tears
Which I have cried
On many a lonely night
And as I lie there
In the dark
I hold my pillow tight

Your sparkling eyes
Your flowing hair
I never saw it turn to snow
I lie awake each night
And I ask the Lord
Why did she have to go?

You left me
Many years ago
The choice was not your own
The Lord he called
Upon you, my Dear
But I’ve seen Grandchildren grown

In this cruel world
I now feel
So old and so alone
And perhaps that’s why
I have been placed
Here, in this nursing home

Well, some say birthdays
Are not for joy
Perhaps this is true I see
And that is why
They were all here today
For this was such a day for me

And I looked down and saw
Those tiny faces
All gathered around me
And I know what the future
Will hold for them
For it is my history

They’ll live and love
They’ll laugh and cry
They will live it day by day
And they’ll seldom feel it
As it slowly
Begins to slip away

Is this to be the woe
Of this old man’s life
To have such a perfect blend
Then to have his past
Catch up with him
To die lonely in…the end

The hardships that
My life has brought
Don’t mean that much to me
They are but things
Which helped define
The man I’ve grown to be

Without the good
I would not be
The person I am now
Without the bad
I know my heart
Would be different somehow

As I sit here now
I take a glimpse
And reflect upon my days
I see the things
Which most stand out
That I’ve known along the way

I see my youth
A little boy
Running in the summer sun
A Dark Shadow
Stood over me
Yet still the days were fun

No child should live
Their days in fear
Of having to come home
They should never have
That constant dread
Wherever they may roam

Some inner rage
Filled him inside
Which I always could see
It tore his soul
I know that’s why
He said those things to me

I’ll never know
That thing inside
Or what upon him fell
But I do wish
To let him know
That I harbor him no ill

I see him now
In a hospital bed
After the stroke that he had
I know he’s trapped
In his own body
With the demons in his head

And I can’t bring forth
Great feelings of love
There’s only sorrow inside of me
There’s no great love
Of Father and Son
‘Cause he would never let it be

So I ask the Lord
To give him now
An ease to his inner strife
May he find at last
The inner peace
That was missing in his life

I’m sure he meant
No harm at all
With the names he daily gave
But what you sing
To the cradle
Can go clear to the grave

What it gave me
Was a dark cloud
On the horizon it would stay
Though I never really
Understood why
It just would not go away

An impending sense
Of dark foreboding
Or of some terrible thing
Always loomed
Out there somewhere
That’s what each day would bring

Those types of scars
They run so deep
And many years it took for me
To accept myself
And not to hate
The one in the mirror that I’d see

In early days
Riding down some street
I’d quietly wonder inside
As I saw each house
I thought to self
What secrets did they hide

Mere words can not
Express it clear
All the hurt he always gave
But it made me feel
Simply not worth
The effort took to save

For years I felt
To be worthless
My soul was such a mess
It felt as if
No one could hear
Silent cries in the darkness

Not all was great
But with the help
Of Special Ones along the way
They filled my days
With love and warmth
And kept Shadows at bay

Some of them are
No longer here
Their time on Earth was through
But the Special Ones
You still can see
Reflected in the things I do

And I miss them so
Most every day
Their efforts so worthwhile
It’s because of them
And it’s their credit
Every time I laugh or smile

Then I grew up
And left this place
Thus began my Army years
And the memories
Of the ones most dear
Helped me face my fears

So out I went
Into the World
And lived as best I could
I lived more life
Throughout those years
Than I ever thought I would

I saw great things
I felt great pains
And within its own time
I learned to quell
The voice within
This troubled heart of mine

But all those things
Came with a price
It was hard for me to pay
So many years
With my Special Ones
I’d missed along the way

I’d come back home
From time to time
To see changes in the place
A few stood out
Others subtle still
As the age crept in their face

And I’d think of all
The years I’d missed
That I never could reclaim
In my mind they’d be
Just as when I’d left
But nothing was the same

Each time I left
I wondered still
How would it be next time
How many changes
Could I endure
To those close in my mind

And so I’d leave
Just one more time
I’d leave them all behind
With a longing heart
And swallowed tears
I’d leave this home of mine

Knowing the whole time
I’d return one day
To see more changes still
I held it off
All the years I could
‘Til I no longer had the will

But the years spent gone
I think worth the price
For the changes made in self
The memories made
I’ll always treasure
As I put them on a shelf

For I learned to face
My darkest fears
To keep my own Shadows at bay
To sort things out
In the still of night
Then rise to face each day

The Dark Shadow that
Once stood over me
Held no more power in my life
For I’d learned how
To break the cycle
Of living my days in strife

Through battles fought
Out in the World
I’d found a better way
Than living life
With constant dread
And peace was here to stay

Then I had the joy
Of coming back
And knowing family once again
I’d came full circle
Back to where
My days had all began

Within just years
I lost a few
Of the ones I held so dear
But to know them again
At their end of life
Still brings my eyes to tear

They’d meant so much
To me through life
Of that I’m sure they know
‘Cause with my own words
I told them clear
Before they had to go

To give something back
To those held dear
For all they’d gave to me
While they were still here
To hear the words
From the man I’d grown to be

To see in their eyes
They knew their life
Had helped someone in pain
They’d made a difference
They’d touched a soul
And their lives were not in vain

So I sit here now
With the journey made
And my dreams that time did bend
I face the days
I hope still to come
Knowing not where it will end

And I know inside
No one in this World
Is as rich a man as Me
From the souls I’ve known
I pass it on
For I have my own family

And my deepest prayer
With quiet reverence
Is my Sons won’t have to know
What it was like for me
To spend my youth
Underneath that Dark Shadow

If I can give them
Nothing else
But a kind and gentle heart
Then the scars in me
Have been worth the price
And the turmoil that it’s wrought

‘Cause when they smile
And their eyes do shine
Every time that they laugh
To pass the gifts
Of my Special Ones
That will be my epitaph

To know they’re loved
To live not in fear
Of what today may bring
To see them live
Their youth in joy
It does make my heart sing

To know they’ll look
Back on their early days
And see good not see bad
To know their own
Dark Shadows do not
Have to be their Dad

And in this way
My Special Ones
Though gone still spread their joys
A piece of them
And the gifts they gave
Lives on in My Boys

How many days
Do we each have
To walk upon this Earth
The only thing
For sure is Death
From the moment of our birth

This one question
And others still
They plague us all it seems
They’ve shown up in
Near every culture
They slip into our dreams

From early on
We feel something
Inside we can’t explain
And we search to find
Our purpose here
As we feel all that life brings

Just a little something
Always there
We can’t quite figure out
What it is we’re
Searching for
What our life is all about

So we take a path
Into the World
We go in our own way
Some will leave
Our place of birth
And others yet will stay

We watch the World
Around us change
As we recall yesterday
We reminisce
For things we lost
Somewhere along the way

Yet still we laugh
And still we love
And hold hope in our heart
That we’ve touched
Someone’s life
And played a special part

Perhaps we hope
Somehow we can
Survive our own mortality
By touching those
With whom we’re close
Long after we’re history

To be recalled
With misty eyes
In someone’s mind one day
To help them through
Some troubled time
That life has brought their way

No greater thing
Could be achieved
Than to help someone
Some memory stored
Then taken out
Long after we are gone

And still we strive
To find the thing
That inside tugs our soul
As we see the face
In the morning mirror
Slowly growing old

What is our life
To be all about
What is our purpose here
What is the thing
We are searching for
The answer’s never clear

We spend our time
In a waking dream
As we wonder through our life
We rejoice in good
We cry in bad
Throughout the joys and strife

And many times
With a troubled heart
As we try to think it right
We’ve sat alone
In a darkened room
In the stillness of the night

Attempting to make
Some sense of life
To put things in their place
To find some kind
Of inner peace
As tears roll down our face

Oh, what is this
That tugs as us
What is it that we feel
Is it destiny
That calls our name
Or is it even real

And all the thoughts
Fill us inside
As they race through our mind
But some force there
Keeps us going forward
With something yet to find

Then morning comes
And at first light
Yet another day begins
And so we rise
To face the day
But the longing never ends

We have special moments
From time to time
We each have hopes and fears
Then as we blink
We discover that
Days have turned into years

We’ve lived our lives
Being all caught up
In just getting through each day
That something we
Were searching for
Got lost along the way

Then quite at once
The face we see
In the mirror says we’re old
That yearning which
We once knew well
Comes back a thousand fold

As we look back
And see our years
And all the things we’ve done
We know the joy
And feel the pain
Of knowing our race is run

In our offspring
We took delight
As we’ve watched them grow
And make the same
Discoveries we’d
Forgotten years ago

Did we ever find
That something deep
That called out to us so
I can not answer
For every one
But as for me I know

I know my life
Was for me to live
No special purpose ever there
The only design
Was of my own
To let someone know I cared

To find someone
In a troubled time
Who’s longing heart does yearn
To give something
Of my own heart
And expect nothing in return

To try to give
Some inner peace
To know they’ve got a friend
Who cares for them
And they’re not alone
Until the bitter end

Just to give
Some one a hug
Is the greatest gift to give
I believe that’s what
Our lives are for
And the reason why we live

‘Cause nothing else
Says we were here
When all is said and done
Like the lives we touch
And the warmth we give
To our Daughters and our Sons

All else we do
It matters not
After our days come to end
It is swept off on
The wings of time
As the dust blows in the wind

So give of yourselves
Give the warmth inside
To someone that you see
When they need it most
Lend a caring hand
And quietly think of me

You’ll never know
Who’s life you’ll touch
If you never even dare
To freely give
To someone in need
And tell them that you care

For me that’s what
My life’s about
No finer thing to do
Than to be the friend
I’d like to have
So I give this now to you

So when it’s your time
To sit alone
In the stillness of the night
Please know that you
Are not alone
And things will be all right

This is the gift
I give to you
It’s all I have to give
A piece of me
To take with you
As through your days you live

I hope that it’s
Enough to help you
Through some troubled time
To know that someone
Out there cared
And it gives you peace of mind

Then pass it on
To someone else
Who’s hurting deep inside
Just give a quiet
Spoken word
Long after I have died

I grew up here
In this little town
Like so many others do
With good and bad
Both in my life
As a million others too

In a troubled youth
I had Special Ones
Who helped me get through each day
But through it all
I never imagined
You were just a few miles away

I can’t help but wonder
Did we ever meet
Did our eyes ever lock before
Did you walk right past
While my back was turned
Or as I held open some door

My youth was rough
You know that now
Perhaps I saw yet couldn’t see
Or could it be that
It just wasn’t time
God was not yet finished with me

And I am not one
To go to church
I have no calling to be there
But my Higher Power
Speaks to me each time
I run fingers through your hair

I know not why
I had to live that life
To go half way round the World
Just to come right back
To this little town
To finally meet my Special Girl

The Lord He works
In mysterious ways
Of that fact I have no doubt
I often think He
Sent me into the World
To help me get my demons out

I think all the pain
Was to shape me into
The man He wanted me to be
To prepare me for
Spending life with you
Before He would give you to me

So He sent me out
Into the World
To go live it day by day
To feel the pain
So I’d know the joy
When I finally came back your way

So I lived out there
Some thirteen years
I absorbed all from life that I could
I saw wonderful sights
Survived terrible lows
More than I ever thought that I would

Yet through all those things
I still wasn’t whole
Something was still missing in life
I rarely did dream
But did often pray
To finally meet you my sweet Wife

Not ‘till I’d given up
And accepted the fact
That I was to live life alone
He’d turned a deaf ear
Or at least so I thought ‘til
You called one night on the phone

For hours we talked
Though never we’d met
At least not that we both do know
It was as if I’d
Known you my whole life
And from that one phone call we’d grow

And I took it slow
I was cautious you see
From the hurt I’d been through before
I wouldn’t survive
The pain one more time
Of watching Love walk out my door

I’d came to believe
That marriage vows were
Just “magic words” that people said
They just didn’t get it
It wouldn’t stand up
To living life both good and bad

Great patience shown
As you helped me believe
That forever was not just a word
That when you said
‘Til death do us part
I could believe what I’d just heard

Through each detail we went
We’d talk at great length
‘Til there was no stone left to turn
We spent many nights
Talking out on the porch
As the fire brighter did burn

And it’s been no picnic
I warned you my Love
A gallant steed I do not ride
I am no Prince Charming
Ever After’s a myth
But here I am still by your side

And through the years
Through our own troubled times
We’ve both done what we said we’d do
To learn all your faults
And your fears inside
Just brought me still closer to you

‘Cause I told you before
I wanted no Princess
A real person by my side to be
To learn of your faults
And that you’re human too
Just endears you that much more to me

Almost fifteen years
Since I read “The Question”
Since I got down on one knee
We’ve raised one great Son
And the other still home
And yet you still put up with me

And there’s nothing else
That touches my soul
Like having you still by my side
And nothing else reaches
Straight into my heart
Like the light shining within your eyes

Sometimes I think Love
Doesn’t come from the heart
It must live in the fingers you see
‘Cause I feel it gentle
Yet feel it so strong
Every time that your hand touches me

I know not how you do it
But I’m glad you have
Stood by me through laughter and tears
And if you’ll still have me
And He will allow
I’ll see you in fifteen more years

‘Cause when the day’s done
In the still of the night
And as I drift off to sleep
I still am so grateful
That He finally gave me
Someone like you to keep

So please know My Love
That after all of the kidding
After all the bad joking I do
You’re still my Sweet Angel
And I thank Him still for
Bringing me full circle to you

Nothing matters
It’s all gone
I’m empty and she doesn’t care
It doesn’t matter
How I feel or what I say
She’s far away
And wouldn’t stay
No matter what I say
It wouldn’t matter anyway
I used to wait for the day
Just to hear her say
I miss you
Guess I was the biggest fool
Didn’t want to think you were cruel
I’m alone now and broken
Left without even one token
Of love or caring
It all died on my birthday
How could I be so daring?
Thought you would understand
Why I was so upset
Instead you got mad at me
And hung up on me
It’s been a week
You wouldn’t even talk to me
How could you do that to me?
Nothing matters at all
I used to stand so tall
Now I wish for the stars
To cover up all these scars
Far away and small
Wonder if you think about me at all
Again I’m a fool for thinking
Guess I should be drinking
If only that were the way to get rid of my sadness
And bring me some gladness
Like I used to have
When I was with you
It was long ago
Why can’t I just let it go?
Like you have
You don’t feel me anymore
You’ve stopped keeping score
It’s all gone, as are you
Now I’m left with nothing to do
But brew
Over what once was
Just because
I’m an idiot and cared
And that is why I dared
To say what I said on my birthday
But I shouldn’t have shared
Because now I feel scared
And lost
And lonely
And hurt
And angry
And stupid
To think there ever was a cupid
For the two of us
Why did I make such a fuss?
It’s all over
I should just roll over
Because nothing matters anymore
You think I’m a bore
You think I’m a chore
And probably a whore
I can’t erase my mistakes
I believed you had forgiven me
I believed you loved me
And even when that part of it ended
I believed that at least there was something that mended
And that we had a friendship
You said you still adored me
You said that your heart still tightened
And that you would become frightened
When I was in trouble
And caught in some bubble
I believed you would help me
Get out of the rubble
Of this life that I live
In Binghamton while you are in Texas
Instead of staying close to me
You chose to make distance
I felt it but ignored it
I thought it was what you needed
I thought I would give it to you
Because you were my friend
And I loved you
I didn’t mind letting you go
I just didn’t want to lose you for good
Yet I did.
How could I know that you would
Let me go?
You let go fast
You forgot our past
Yes we had a past
A good past, a bad past
A past nonetheless
I understand you though
You don’t want to remember it
You’d rather forget what we had
It is easier that way
I understand that
Who would want to remember the pain?
So you let me go fast and furious
Anytime I tried to talk about our past
You ran away fast
And I was left last
And I acted rash
It made me so sad though
That I was so slow
To recognize what you did
Long ago
And what others could see
But I never wanted it to be like that
And so I sat, and got fat
Denying what you could see
Which was what could again never be.
You saw the truth in front of us
Coming at us like a bus
About to hit
Difference between you and me was,
You got out of the way
And I chose to stay
In the way
Of a tragedy
Which was my soul shattered
You had sense enough to scatter
While I was like, “what’s the matter’?
What a fool I was
Thinking that you still loved me like you once did
When instead you saw me as a kid
A fool and youngster
Naïve to the core
I have always been so unsure
This is not your problem though
And you made that clear
When you forgot all that I held dear

We grew up together,
We were close,

Time went by and it was time to graduate,
That in which I hate,

Because we would have to move on,
And have to say so long,

I moved away,
And he stayed,

It had been two years since we saw each other,
And when we did we had great laughter,

We talked about old time and our lives,
There were some things I despised,

It was time to say goodbye again,
When would we see each other when,

A few months later I heard he was engaged,
There was a big part of me that was full of rage,

Because I liked him in school,
And I still do yet I really do,

As the months doubled,
I ran into some trouble,

I had to move home,
though I moaned for so long,

I heard things didn’t go well for him,
As I prayed the lord and said amen,

I was hurt inside,
Because it looked like he wanted to cry,

He moved home,
Now I didn’t feel so alone,

We hung out a lot,
As he told me the whole plot,

I told him I liked him more than I should,
He said maybe someday if he could,

He’s my best friend,
I hope this stray will soon have a happy end!

It was the moment when time seems to pause for awhile,
I was dazzled and taken for what I had witnessed,

feeling weak and defenseless against your lovely face
and timeless precious smile,
oh dear you take my breath away.
I had tried a thousand times trying to ignore you,
make you feel not being noticed nor admired,
avoiding every longed moment and opportunity
to have just a glimpse of you

but somehow again,
I was being conquered by your amazing passion in life,
and leaving me helpless of not loving you.
We became friends,
even thought in reality I never know who you really are or

what I may end up if gamble my tired and lonely heart
to someone as mysterious as you,
fears slowly creeping deep inside for I am afraid
that the beauty you had shown will one day just disappear.
I wish I could easily untie my heart from my horrible past,
I am confused and frightened for the truth is
my soul longed to know you more,
where heart beats faster its time you are near.
Yes, I do desire of being with you all the time,
dreaming to hold your hand and kiss your tender lips,
and if I had one last wish before I die
I would rather spend it a day with someone as beautiful as you.

Near the wishing well, our hands entwined,
Where stand we to see the direction of our lives.

Frustrated and angry with all that we have tried,
I’m tired and dying, hoping to be revived.

A copper coin from me to you, to give to the well
To pay its due.
My hopes I toss in too,
Oh please! Please, make these dreams come true!

Beneath the calm and glassy pool, an army of hopes and dreams lies still,
Lulled to sleep in waters cool, entrapped within a frigid chill.
Cast in ages past and long ago by others in righteous act,
By lovers and dreamers or so, like brothers of a secret pact.

With bated breath and fragile heart, I’m anxious for your toss.
Each moment casts a fiery dart, and this wait becomes a cross.

I wonder if your wish will be as mine.
Will our hearts merge to form a single line?
Or, and I dread the thought,
Will you commit a crime?
Will your soul be bought, will your cast be far from mine?

Of your choice I have no assurance.
Of mine, I’ve known forever.
I have loved you without insurance, and I will love you ever.

And as that golden hope floats from fragile fingers,
Toward the awaiting ocean of whispered prayers,
I know that in its sweeping, graceful arch there lingers
Abounding joy eternal, or torturous, painful cares.

Here near the wishing well, our hands entwined,
Where stand we to see the direction of our lives.

I’ve lost something very precious today,
I’ve lost something that never ever was,
I have lost the core of my soul today
And I mourn in despair for my sad loss.

I have lost what I once believed was true,
I’ve lost what I once thought would surely be,
I have lost what I have believed in for years
And I cry out in my sorrow-why me!

A lugubrious expression on my face,
I do try in vain to our story retrace

The memories are hazy, but very strong
And I woefully wonder, “What what went wrong?”

Teary-eyed I remember those parties-
Oh, the funthe joythe laughter-so hearty!

Our school festival-how we danced! How we sang!
And throughout the day and night, our voices rang!

Then, we were all the Children of Innocence,
Then, pride, greed, jealousy were of no essence.

We all believed in living for the moment,
And our time together was very well spent.

We were oblivious to the world outside
And our immaturity, we did not hide.

We walked hand-in-hand without a single care,
Our hopes, our dreams, our ambitions we did share.

Some said that we were more than just childhood friends,
Others said we would stick by each other to the end.

But we did care little to what people said
And with our own lives, we simply went ahead.

‘Friends Forever!’ That’s what we declared to all,
We would stand united, we would never fall.

But Alas! The sands of time have changed us now,
I just don’t see why NoI just don’t see how.

You now confess that you’ve just been using me,
And my heart cries out aloud, “How can that be!”

I trusted you! Oh, I confided in you!
Now that you’re gone, what am I supposed to do?
I believed you
When you told me that I was your best friend.
I believed you
When you said our friendship would never end.
My heart would skip a beat
Each and every time you’d give me that smile.
My heart would skip a beat
Every time we would stop and talk a while.

I ask myself, “Why did it have to end now?”
“Is there nothing we can do some way somehow?”

But you give me the answer loud and clear-
You don’t need me close, you don’t need me near.

You now say that you don’t want me any more.
With those words, you kill my heart from the core.

You now say that we were never ever friends,
You just needed me to achieve your own ends.

And now that you are happy, you are content,
You wish to take back the “friendship” you had lent.

You tell me that I must move on in my life,
There is a long road ahead a lot more strife.

I sniff but say, Yes, I will on, My Love,”
“I shall take wings of hope and fly like a dove.”

Your memory will live on deep in my heart,
But with my faith and hope, my life will re-start,

For we often lose those whom we love, we trust,
But to learn to move on in life is a must.

Im hurt, but I will be okay, I will be fine.
Between self pity and strength is a thin line

I sigh as I look back at my so-called friend.
We were wrong, My Dear, our friendship did end.

You have moved on now and so shall I, in time.
To be sad, to be insecure, is no crime,

But I won’t give in to these feelings of mine,
I shall move on in my life, I shall be fine.