Warm Winter

Warm Winter 2.00/5 (40.00%) 3 votes

Sensing the approach of dark grey clouds
Feeling cold breezes passing through me
Looking for my own shadow
Beyond the horizon of my visual perception
Longing for the fall of the first raindrop
Summer is sad for the time it had this year
As winter had almost found its way here
Rain in winter is nothing but summer’s tears

Fear consumes me every single year during this time
Depression controls my own soul like clouds in the sky
Loneliness overtakes the freedom I had felt in summer
But this year with you nothing of the above can occur

Showers will fall soon like rivers from the goddess
With you by my side I always have a shelter to save me
Cold shall freeze everything even grass turns to yellow
In the warmth of your love beating heart for sure I’ll be
Feeling security touching tranquility grasping lovability
Thunder strikes are struggling racing which to hit earth first
But for that word from your lips my ears are already in thirst
White snowflakes will cover this land and turn it to another pole
Seeing love in you hypnotizing eyes will be my eyes’ only goal

This Christmas I have no requests from Santa
As I had my gift much earlier when god sent me you
This year there’s no need for me buying wine
As I would long for your lips every time I feel thirsty
This winter I have no jackets to wear my dear
As long as I have your arms to embrace me when I’m cold
This Valentine’s Day I don’t have to sleep early alone
As I will love you not all day long but all days long or short

In this particular moment I’m writing this and I want you
In this particular moment I’m writing this and I need you
In this particular moment I’m writing this and I miss you
In this particular moment you’re reading this and I want you
In this particular moment you’re reading this and I need you
In this particular moment you’re reading this and I miss you

In every single moment whether it’s winter spring summer or autumn
I’m wanting you, needing you, missing you, and LOVING YOU

Three Questions

Three Questions 3.75/5 (75.00%) 8 votes

Usually I think what have I done to deserve this pain
It feels like something is running within my veins
It’s something intangible
It’s something valuable
I’ve heard once that pain can become addictive
I remember laughing once I’ve heard that adjective
It’s something logical
It’s something valuable
Of course I do not mean pain in it definable meanings
Best things in life can make us cry like love and feelings
For me there’s another name for pain it’s called “YOU”
You are the intangible and your presence is valuable
You are the logical addiction and you are the lovable
You represent all the definable meanings
You summarize all the existing feelings
And now you may understand my question
What have I done to deserve “YOU” in my life?

Had you ever missed someone like I constantly do
Even when we’re talking I feel that I’m missing you
I never got bored of listening to the voice talking to me
Like the voice of a sea shell singing the sound of the sea
It’s something attractive
It’s something adaptive
I’ve heard once that distance can be destructive and cruel
For lovers who are separated miles apart
I remember hearing that it’s the first step in breakup rules
But it’s ineffective when I miss you
While you’re lying here within my heart
It’s something provocative
It’s something prerogative
For me there’s another name for longing it’s called “You”
You are the attractive and your voice is the adaptive
Your absence is provocative and your presence is prerogative
You are the core waves formed in the sea
You are the voice God talks through to me
And you may understand my second question
What have I done to deserve that “YOU” in my life?

Thinking about people’s chances in life
Some people get it all and the rest strive
As I constantly remind myself I don’t want it all
There is that one tiny thing I aim for
It’s love versus nothing there is no or
It’s something like gamble
It’s something like scramble
The only thing that’s worse than one is none
Even if I lose there’s something to be done
Few are those who deserve what they take
Most people spend their nights dreaming awake
It’s something truly valid
It’s something deeply Solid
For me there’s another name for chance it’s called “YOU”
Making you a part of life is the ultimate gamble
While your absence makes it a game of scramble
Maybe I’m delusional, maybe I got lost
But not every song is made only by its rhymes
And you may now understand my third question
If love is forsaken and driven by St. Valentine
Then why are your feelings driven by Jack Frost
I find it to tell you that my statements are valid
No love can spread freely out of something that solid.

“She Loves Me Not”

“She Loves Me Not” 3.56/5 (71.11%) 9 votes

She loves me… she loves me not.


On the corner of the street, you catch my eye.

You are the most beautiful person,

I’ve ever seen.

At the back of the room, you steal my heart.

You are the brightest thing here.

I have never seen such a beautiful thing.


You have stolen my heart,

And you can either return it,

Or keep it for yours in return.


I love you as if there was no sun,

And the world has drifted far away,

And there was no one but you and me.

I love you without question, for you are

Everything; my best friend and my darling.

And though you do not love me back,

And though I love you more and more each day,

It is okay. It is okay that you do not feel

My heart’s longing, for that is something

I cannot make you feel.


But darling, there is no way I will never tell you

That I love you. For I cannot see myself without

Trying in the least. And if there was no sun, you

Would be my sun; and if our world had drifted far away,

You would be my world anew.


I love you darling; I love you through pain,

Love through laughter, love

Through heartbreak, love

Through and through.


I love you and miss you when I dream,

For my day with you, even if

It is only one glimpse, far outdoes my

Wildest dream.

I love you in the peril of my heart,

And the quiet of my soul.


There is no way in which

I do not love you. I love you

Despite your faults, for you

Are not perfect without them.

When I love you, it is not

Because you are without them, but

Because you have them, for perfection

Is not being without faults, but learning

To love you through them. And that is why you

Are perfect to me in every way.


I am deprived of you, my darling.

I am sick with love, sick

Without aid,

Without remedy,

Without cure.

For there is nothing I can take

That will make me stop loving you

In every way.


From the first moment I met you,

From the last moment I saw you,

And everything in between,

I have loved you as if you were already mine,

And as if you had been for a very long time.

And though you are not, though you may

Never be, there is nothing you can do

That will stop me from loving you.


If my heart will get the best of me,

While I am left without the best of you

Then I may never love someone again,

At least, not as I love you.

I love your laughter as a sweet and budding flower.

I love your smile as the sun pours across your skin,

And the waves in the back roll in, seamlessly,

Endlessly, I love you, and the sun sets its

Eye above the horizon, and you smile

And laugh and love the moment

You are in, for it is perfect, just as you are,

And before the sun fades away, know that

Its true, that I love you, I do.


Everything I do is for you, so you will love me

In return, for I have tried far too hard

For far too long, and I cannot bear

the pain of never loving you if you will not love me.


Still know, that though this may be the truth,

A truth I despise with everything that I have,

I will love you till my heart beats no more,

And the waves cease to roll, and the moon falls

From the sky. I’ll love you till the sun burns out,

And every star has faded from view, and nothing is

Left. And though nothing remains, I will still love you yet,

For you are everything I have, everything I hold onto,

And one day, you may just understand how much

You mean to me my darling.

A Few Little Cuts

A Few Little Cuts 3.89/5 (77.78%) 9 votes

It all started with a knife,

A blade that shined so bright,

That would scar pale flesh

On that dark and lonely night.

A few little cuts that would just get deeper

And deeper they did go,

As little lines of crimson blood

Stained the skin, white as snow.

Then something would happen

And away this mind would fly,

This body unable to stand

Beginning to feel high.

The scars will begin to fade,

But forever they’ll be there,

Bringing shame to that hand

Hoping no one will stare.

The pain is so good

But it only just a feeling,

She knows it’s time to stop

And begin some form of healing.

Only it’s hard to stop

No matter how hard she tries

And with every new cut forming

Brings tears to her eyes.

She must try harder to stop

And harder she will do,

Hoping one day she’ll just stop hurting

And free from harm will be true




~slow Dance~

~slow Dance~ 2.67/5 (53.33%) 3 votes

Take my hand,
Step in closer
Let me feel your bossom
How your heart roves at…
Now draw a leg aback
And bring it forth again
let me take you about,
in a little dance session.
How you like the twinkle lights,
How you like the chill
(How I love your breath! How I love the arcs in you eyes!)
My knees shudder, weak…
I know, yours too.
I see you stagger a little
And I hold your small.
The song still plays,
But the rhythm changes thus…
Slowly, your chin falls onto my shoulder
My heart begins to shudder…
My hands begin dancing to the tune
Fingers working your way.
In a feetle, rubbing tenderly.
You move in closer,
Your bosom against mine.
As though losing grip,
My cheek rubs onto your own.
I feel the tender peck you plant on it.
(Its a magic turn)
Our lips lock!
You kiss by the book and I, like a crook…
What a perfect trance!
We’re off to the brook!
My fingers express mastery
Moving about gingerly.
Unfastening the clips.

You tilt your bosom aback
And give away your apples,
My mouth does justice,
Sharp pecks about.
Soft moans-music,
As the motion grows intense!
My curious hands find way beneath your short jean skirt;
My finger tips smooth tap your smoothies
(Its magic still, and more…)
The lingerie…
I don’t know
All I know is my fly flies low
And a grand voyage to the slip-soft of you…
Tenderly trading back and forth,
You’re speaking animal language.
A luxurious light sparkles in your eyes…
You begin to shiver
Your fists clench my sides…
And one loud moan,
It comes with a feel I hardly understand
My back curls,
And tap
We’re at the height of Verona bower.
My back rests on the glass pillar.
I begin to recover,
And realize the whole club has had a treat to a movie…
(What happened Hinkle?) she whispers
Slow dance…
Thats my response.

Gone Dreaming

Gone Dreaming 2.25/5 (45.00%) 4 votes

I hear Mother Nature’s loud footsteps
Walking up to her lovely son

She, with her soft hands caresses his bold head
Sending him into a feel of relaxation.
The chill soon sweeps him off to a world…
A land, so divided from the ordinary
A world where all could be heroes
And all could be villains
A world where a lunatic sits in a throne,
Judging not fellow lunatics but men of brains

In scattered templates of imagery
In the faintest of vision
In the realest of reality
A world lovable or detestable thus
A world that you soon won’t love to lose

But soon, comes a slight tap
Onto the sense of stupidity
And out we come,
Wishing to have stayed some more time
Wishing we could own that world, just another time!

Looking upon the past,
So many toys have I lost
And castles so vast
But all seems a ghost
In my nude mind, they came and clothed me in garments so noble
Escaping from this…
This world I am used to
This world of lies
This world of presumptions
This world of color
And facts of lies:
The world of dreams.

Promises of Time

Promises of Time 2.50/5 (50.00%) 4 votes

Since that never forgotten day
time has promised to give a cure
for the addiction you once gave me
but the deal seems to remain obscure
since that day you had to walk away
I’m not done with even a single memory

It was nobody’s fault after all
pure destiny pushed us to fall
everything we have was suddenly gone
like stars at the early hours of dawn

Since the day you were far too gone
time has promised me a new life after you
someone someday will simply fill your place
day after day I’ve been waiting for that one
but now I know you’re not the one I can replace
where I’ve always kept you can’t ever hold two
with the winds I’m going to run looking for the sun

I find it hard to sleep at night
we shouldn’t have given up the fight
I really do miss you by my side
you shouldn’t have taken that flight

I know for everything we do there’s a reason
but I’m not convinced with destiny nor fate
I am so much done with our committed treason
It’s not you it’s life after you that I hate

Time shall open up for the words today I’ll promise
we have gone into the deepest wild of this infernal life
we have been living few last years in sorrow and disgrace
skies have repeatedly cried for our sorrow and strife
the kingdom we once built awaits there for you princess
I’ll race the clouds to tear down the tears on your face

It’s never too late as long we have time
time that we’ve paid for doing that crime
crime we have to put behind and deeply regret
regret for the days we missed but never forget

With blind closed eyes under the raining skies
through roses of your smell above the underneath hell
by the sound of your voice disagreeing any other choice
I’ll come to find you again having nothing to lose
but your love to regain I’ll stand up for destiny
having nothing to lose but to retain back my sanity

Time is what I will promise to have you eternally
years passing again and again on our anniversary
light up the candles I’m coming for you
time has passed but I could never let go…

A Cry from the Wilderness

A Cry from the Wilderness 3.00/5 (60.00%) 2 votes

A voice cries from the wilderness
Searching to find a friend
Someone they hope will care about
Their life until its end
I think we all are searching for
Someone to understand
To share all of life’s good and bad
In a dark, hostile land
A lonely soul, lost in the night
Who can no longer hide
The hurt I think we all have felt
Living life terrified
I hear the cry as it rings out
I know its haunting tone
The feeling from behind the voice
Of being all alone
The fear, the hopes, the hurt inside
Too many times to tell
I’ve heard it come from the darkness
I know it all too well
I recognize from deep inside
I know the fear it brings
I start to answer as the cry
Again from pitch black rings
It makes the hair on my neck stand
It cuts me to the bone
How can someone survive out there
With no love to be shown
 A desperate cry from darkness comes
Another soul in pain
It reaches to my very core
As the echoes remain
Does no one hear the cry ring out
Is anybody there
To lend a hand to this poor soul
Does anybody care
Has life became so damn complex
That everyone today
Lives just for Self, has everyone’s
Compassion lost its way
I call out now to find the voice
Yet no answer is heard
An eerie silence fills my ears
My very soul is stirred
What is wrong with humanity
How can we let this be
I hear the cry and realize…
It comes from…within…me

Tears, Pain & A Happy End

Tears, Pain & A Happy End 3.75/5 (75.00%) 4 votes

For reasons that  I can’t explain

your all I think about.

knowing that whats coming could be pain

but how times have changed,

how much we’ve grown

from high school days

to being people of our own

its just never easy to understand how it happened

one minute you were here and the next,

the moment had already happened.


am I foolish, must be, why else would I do this.

let you in, so you can rip it all from within

how you come back, but never stay

bring aches to my head, confusion to my mind

break my heart, and questions all day

I’ll handle  pain, sorrow, and the  lonely  f*ck all else

I realized that I love you more than I love myself.

and I admit, I want you, and with this, I’ll prove it


ugh the shit I do, I fall too quick and stay down too long.

when you come back my attention turns to you

the memories come too fast, and leave to slow

so read this, hurry up n say bye

but this time at least I’ll know why.


I had it all wrong about the motive

was never the silly little fights and long nights

or the Arguments for no reason during cuffin season

but f*ck that babygirl don’t you know,

be mine,

and its you my world I’ll show

one hello my way

brings my smile a different kind of glow

if your mine, im yours


let go of all the insecurities

and the thoughts you have telling you

that you ain’t cute to me

or how “us as we will never really be”

red light those lies, they all myth, fairy tales & make believe

girl stop it, all im thinking about being just you and me

beauty and brains, can’t decide which one first so its a dead heat

be here is something I just wanna do

so  I’ll never be a vegetable dad no dead beat

never let the negativity get the best of you

yeah, thats how the clouds form

but if you let me in ima bring sunlight to your brainstorm


so I’ll wait, and think about this

wait for you with the bad news to hit

I guess I just can’t have you for this ride

the pain is too long when your by my side

the fear is too strong so I hide

the tears are too much so I cried

but when I look back later on I’ll say that I tried.

I guess this time its me that says bye.


Losing You

Losing You 3.25/5 (65.00%) 4 votes

I met you 6 years ago, and as silly children we were enemies

We would scowl at each other in the bathrooms, ignore each other on the playground

Until a boy came into our lives; he was both of our best friends and we knew him as Baba

We eventually grew closer, until we were the best of friends; the three of us..

Then I had to leave; my parents we’re divorcing and I had to move

We parted with hugs, tears, and chocolates, and I lost your phone number

I still thought of you everyday, and I imagined you thought of me too

I would hope and dream to someday see you again, until I got my wish

My mom and I were moving back! Oh, how happy I was!

On my first day of school -4 years later- I was in Drama class

And this girl walked up to me and asked if my name was Jenn, and I looked up

What I saw shocked me; it was you! you! oh, I missed you!

We instantly resumed our long-lost friendship, and I was so happy

A few more friends were added to our group, and nothing went wrong until one girl..

One girl started spreading false rumours; she was jealous of our friendship

She did everything in her power to turn us against each other; and sometimes she succeeded

But we always reunited in the end, not this time though..

Two years after we met again, there came some complications.

A new girl in school, she spread hurtful rumours about the two of us

And you did everything in your power to save our ties, but we still fought through it afterwards!

Until your little sister told your parents a lie.. She ruined my life.

She told your parents something that made them believe I was a bad influence.

And they gave you rules! They forbid you from texting me, and you were only able to talk to me if I talked first!

I look at you every day wondering if you’re even missing me like I miss you, because you don’t seem troubled

In fact, you seem happy. Is the one person I shared all my secrets with happy to be rid of me?

Was my best friend for so long, who I have so many memories with, a liar? Was she faking?

Now schools almost over, and you still won’t talk to me..

I won’t even have any memories for when I move away again; do you even care?

It hurts me so bad to think I never once had a friend who liked me for who I was, who I AM!

Losing you has done a lot to my unstable sanity; none of it for the better

You were my anchor, and now you’ve been suddenly ripped away from me

I have no crutch to lean on, and I don’t know what to do about it; but I’m going to do my best

I do have something, someone, to live for.. And I won’t give up!

Long Term Memory

Long Term Memory 3.67/5 (73.33%) 3 votes

It should be long over now.  Years and distance and silence fall between us as an abyss, uncrossable and immeasurably wide.  There should be no trace on you in my thoughts, nor a shadow of you in my memory; Time heals all wounds.

Yet still I can taste your lips on mine, still I can see your face so clearly.  I can track the smell your perfume in a crowd to a single woman, irrationally hoping against hope that it will be you.

It never is.

Years and distance and silence fall between us, and our lives have grown so far apart.

I should be allowed to forget.

I can still smell the heavy air, the trees and the wind.  We were together, and separate.  Connected, and disconnected.  I came because you asked me to, as I always will.  We did our best to create the illusion everyone expected, but I was so tired of those games.  I walked outside, away from that throng of people, just needing that air, and the peace of being alone.  Soon you were there again, and for once you seemed to really understand where I was headed.  You stepped closer.  A look passed between us.  Our lungs reported the cold of the air in visual clouds of exhalation.  Hesitation on your tongue, you reach for my hand.  I could not move, nor speak nor think.  Closer, warmer and more immediate with each moment, you pressed against me.  Building towards such a powerful and desperate screaming need, and yet when we submitted, it was the softest kiss I ever gave or received.  The sky opened then and the snow fell.  Every snow that falls brings me back to that moment.  I have never again felt a kiss that so clearly said “I love you”.

I have felt that kiss on my lips everyday since, despite the years and distance and silence.

I should be allowed to forget.

Beautiful Sight

Beautiful Sight 2.67/5 (53.33%) 3 votes


The first time I acknowledged Eric was in Social Studies class, amid a project at the start of February. I glimpsed over at him when he was doing his project. He appeared isolated, apprehensive, and misconstrued by everyone around him. His dark brown eyes nearly black unveiled a great enigma cryptic beneath reticence. His brown-brunette hair lightly ensconces his radiant face. Statuesque in every way possible, alluring scent, laughable, delighted with the people he knew captured my utter most interest to get to know him. Having his presence anywhere near me sends my heart racing and butterflies firing.



He faced the class to take attendance. I gazed in his direction when he acquired my presence. I giggled at him when he nearly fell asleep. We chatted for a few before we payed attention. His charm and simple words to me captured my complete attention.



His timid state with talking to me is adorable to me. It became apparent that he was in two more of my classes. Acknowledging his presence took a long time for me to acquire. Having him in math and being partners when we could was quite nice. We chatted and learned more about each other every day.



When we got to know each other more, he took me along to admire the beauty of rafting with his family and his brother’s friends. That was the most interesting thing to watch. His family is delighted to have me along. That sense of love from him and his family delights me. The beauty of being with those who love you sends jubilation all around.



That year was the best I have had in a long time. Eric is the one I love the most out of any other guy that I would ever meet in my lifetime. The fact that we have each other is more than I can ask for. The people around me may think differently but I wouldn’t care because I know who he is and I love him for him not necessarily just his looks. I love him for him that’s all I know.

I loved him first and I loved him last

Believe in Yourself

Believe in Yourself 4.00/5 (80.00%) 2 votes

Long brown hair & her big brown eyes, a heart of gold, that’s oversized!
She hides behind her “comfy” disguise, but sometimes needs to improvise…
Often hiding her feelings deep inside, she covers her pain & all of her cries…
He watched her eyes fill up with tears, continued to yell & went upstairs…
As she fell to her knees, she was holding her heart, her minds all a mess, she’s falling apart.
Always left alone & ignored for years, she took the abuse as he disappeared.
She plays along, but often acts dumb, all the neglect has made her feel numb…
Her heart of gold will never say no, dishin’ out cash is startin’ to get old…
Money for this & money for that, she gets all stepped on, like a door mat.
Lana, open your eyes, stand up for yourself, as much as it hurts, you should be by yourself.
Time to focus on life & clear your mind, don’t get discouraged, it may take some time…
Don’t stay alone, enjoy company with friends, and never let a guy make you pretend…
You’re a strong woman, you can stand on your own, and you proved this to me when you bought your first home!
Always remember, time heals all pain, life gives us lessons, we often feel drained…
You’ll make it through this, we’re all on your side, and never let anyone kick down your pride!
Hold your head high, you’re the kids 1 role model, you can do better, don’t ever twaddle…
Never give up, you’ll soon find the 1, you’ll then realize that life’s just begun!
You’re independent, a mind of your own, you better kick Dave, right off his throne…
It’s now Lana’s time, you raised 2 great kids, and it now is the time to put down your fist…
Don’t ASK him to leave, TELL him to go; it’s now Lana’s time to run this show…
You’re my close friend & I truly believe, with all your heart you can only succeed!
Stand up for your rights & never give up, chill with your girls & do your makeup…
Feel proud of yourself, with your beautiful soul; don’t let a man keep you under control…
Kicking Dave to the curb is the answer indeed, you know it’s the truth, you can’t disagree!
It’s now in your hands, it’s your time to shine, I believe in you girl, please don’t resign…
You can turn to your friends when you feel weak, I promise to care & to never critique…
Friends till the end, we’re meant to be, believe in yourself & you’ll soon be free!

Can an Automatons Heart Break?

Can an Automatons Heart Break? 3.50/5 (70.00%) 2 votes

I long to hear the whirring of my gears and gadgets. 
The gentle “putt putt putt” of my motor pumping oil through the conduits they call veins.

The clink and the clank of each servo doing what it is designed to do. 
A pressure regulator with the label:  “H.R.T. made in Taiwan” doing nothing more than its basic function. 
Pump the oil from here to there, make sure each part is lubricated enough to move. 
Circuits relaying information and a processor to prioritize each data file, stored for later evaluation, or deleted. 
Upgraded with the latest virus protection and spam-blocker, my CPU would be a wonder of perfection. 
Tides of order amid an ocean of distractions and chaos. 

But I am not the fluid machine I once was. 
My levers are rusted and cannot move, I should call a technician to tighten or loosen, or oil and soon they could perform again. 
But the wires from my attempted self-repairs are showing.  Shorts are throwing off sparks of illumination and danger. 
I am in need of refurbishing.  I am broken and must be fixed. 
Yet I know that I am obsolete and would be discarded without thought if I allow them to inspect me too closely. 
So I sit at my specified station, off in the corner busying myself with the work that I am intended to complete. 
I draw no attention to my leaking parts, to the decay that has gathered on my torso. 
I have only one good hand now, and it does the work of two. 
I’m a bit slower than I was, but that’s to be expected from such old operating software.  
Maybe they won’t notice that I am ready for the scrap heap. 
If I just keep working here alone, maybe they won’t notice me.

An End Restarted; A Dream Revisited.

An End Restarted; A Dream Revisited. 3.00/5 (60.00%) 2 votes

(Here on this site, I choose to begin this again.  My hands move slower than they once did.  Better slowly than the fevered pace that once threatened to overwhelm me.  My thoughts as always, turn to her.  Still I wonder how she fares.  What power we give to others over our feelings!)

You healed my heart and broke it all in the space of a single breath. 
You didn’t even notice that I was there, paying such rapt attention to your words. 

Lost time is angry tonight, cursing me. 
Turns and twists that I never saw, now so long behind me that there is no strength left to return. 
It is the most potent joke.  There can be nothing that is not affected by what was, but still I can dream. 
I can dream of a moment in time, held and still held.  Perfected by all its flaws, needed and wanted. 
Pure in its filth and sin; vile in its love and passion.  There can be no escaping this truth, even if it is a lie. 
The sun sets low in the sky, me above it.  It feels as though that sinking light is stealing something important from me. 
I return to cold and dark, as I must.  You never knew.  I can never let you know.  But I so desperately want to tell you.  But once those words are formed and set free, they will trap us as even now we are trapped. 
There can be no future as we dream it, only as it is.  But still I can dream.

Even now, I think on the contradictions of us.  When we most need each other, we cannot be there. 
Either we aren’t ready, or we have no choice.  Seeing and not seeing, both;
They are a hurt visited again and again foolishly, or bravely.  Which that is, I am uncertain. 
Do we return to be loved despite the hurt or because of it?  I can’t say that I am certain, but I can still dream. 

Great love and great pain are all we ever have for each other, and it would have been enough for me. 
I would have allowed myself to be consumed by that fire if it meant for a time I could feel the warmth of you. 
Now so many years later, it is a joke on me, and on you. 
We who turn from warmth, holding the edges of sanity in the dark, screaming at nothing and hoping no one hears us. 
I wish so many good things for you, but still I want you. 
How can I want you, and still want you happy, knowing what I know?  I cannot be with you, but I wish. 
I want you to be happy and safe, but I wish.  I can’t have everything I want, but I can dream.