Running Away (for a Friend)

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Just running.
Feeling the wind on my back.
Just moving.
Getting away from where I am.

Please forgive me.
I didn’t mean what I said.
Please forget me.
It will be healthier that way.

No problems.
That’s just a lie.
No perfection.
It’s something you can’t expect.

Feel the hurt.
That’s how I felt too.
Feel the anger.
How I feel when I see you.

None can help.
It’s something I need to do on my own.
None can see.
Keeping it hidden from the world.

I’m running.
I’m running.
I’m gone.

Imagine This

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Imagine this

A girl happy skateboarding around a neighborhood with her friends
No pain just…Happiness
She’s got her wonderful friends in real life and on the internet
Nothing can ruin the friendship
She’s a healthy young girl who’s always active and gives good advice
Is caring…Never sad and never breaks down
Do you have that image in your head?
Can you feel her happiness?

Now imagine this

A girl sitting on a window sill looking out the window
Looking out at the rest of the kids having fun…
While she’s in her room trying to deal with her pain
Most of the time she writes, plays instruments, sings, or cuts…
She’s in so much pain she mostly sings it out or screams…Or breaks down
She’s blocking out so many people…
She’s blocking out the world she’s in her room…A mess
People try to help but she ignores them…
She’s waiting for someone to come rescue her from her pain…
Do you have that image?
Can you feel her pain?

Meaningless Words

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You say these words,
And act like you can hurt me.
You think I’ll fall down sobbing.
You think that I am worthless.

Well I know who you are,
And I know what you’ve done.
Still, there is nothing you can say,
To make me cry or run.

All the hateful words you’ve said,
Are like mosquitoes in my ear.
They buzz around,
But are soon forgotten.

You cannot knock me down.
You cannot make me squirm.
You cannot convince me of things,
Because you are a little worm.

I do not respect you.
I do not like you.
I do not want you in my life because,
Your hatred isn’t new.

You had to show everyone,
What you said to me.
You need public gratification.
You need everyone to see.

So listen to this,
If you only listen to one thing.
You have not won.
You are no champ.

The real winner here is the Devil.
He’s laughing down in Hell.
He’s glad that you said those things.
He’s so happy, he wants to scream and yell.

Everything you say.
Everything you do.
Everything that hurts,
Will all come back to you.

I believe in Karma.
I believe in God.
I believe that one of them will make you pay.
Those stupid little words you said have bundled in a wad.

Your words are meaningless to me.
They fall limp at the floor.
So keep on jabbering.
No one is listening, they have shut the door.

It Tears You Apart

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I know it hurts you to see me with him

I know it hurts you to know I am with him

I know it hurts you to say goodbye

I know it hurts you to know I have to go back to him

 

It tears you apart to think that I am not yours completely

Even though I am yours at heart

It tears you apart to know that you have to come last in my life

 

Because even though I am yours at heart

I can not be yours completely

Because I have to spend my life with him

 

I know it hurts

I know it tears you apart but,

Now it is tearing us apart

 

It hurts me to see you hurt

 

Every time I have to deny you

Every time I have to ignore you

Just because I can’t be yours completely

 

I don’t know what to do

It makes me sad

It frightens me to think that

You may not be around for much longer

You might walk away

Just because you are tired to wait

Tired to come last

Tired to be alone

 

You know my heart belongs to you

But I can not be yours completely

 

I am frightened of losing you

I can’t bear it

I love you

But I am stuck

I don’t know what to do

Choice

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Suddenly I’m asked to choose

Asked to decide between two people

And to change something thats been my life

Something thats been my life for over 7 years..

I know what I want but I don’t know how to say it!

How do I tell her that I’m not choosing her?

I love my father and I love my mother

But She treats me with disrespect

And she doesn’t trust me!

But telling her I’m leaving her

Will make her cry

And seeing your mother cry.. Hurts