Katt | Free Poems
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Why?
You sleep next to me
Peacefully
Unaware of the turmoil raging in my mind
I like you
Like a lot
More than I should
Every time you put your arms around me,
My heart skips a beat
My breathing quickens
My cheeks flush
My skin heats
And I pray you don’t notice
These changes in me
Why?
Dear Lord why now do you do these things?!
Why now when I belong to another
And can not belong to you
Though my heart longs for it to be so?!
Why now?
Why now after all this time do you step forward and ask me to dance?
Why now do you hold me?
Why now do you kiss me when you think I won’t notice?
Why now?
Why now do you admit your feelings for me?
I can not return them!
I will only hurt you
And me
And him.
Why now do you admit to me
Why now do you let me know
Why now when I can not love you
Back?
This poem is also about:Free
There are too many lights here
Too many faces
No space
I want to be free, out in the open
Away from the clutter
I want to be in the woods,
Among the un-judging trees
I want to be where the air is fresh
And there is only you and me
Where silence is our blanket
And the river our lullaby
The simplicity the gift
And the air our only clothes
Nothing is hidden or needs to be
For we are ourselves
No need to be false
We can be
Real
Alive
Free
Not Inanimate
The sky is blue but not like me blue
It’s a happy shade of brand new baby boy blue.
I’m a dark blackish bruised blue
The clouds drift by unnoticed but not like me unnoticed
A little child or young adult might look upon them and see their beauty
No one sees me or if they do, they look right through me
The trash in the parking lot is blown about but not like me blown about
It is tossed about by the wind, the real wind that ruffles hair and chills your skin
I am tossed about by imaginary winds of judgment, misunderstandings and failures
The sidewalk is trampled upon but not like me trampled upon
People walk and run on it, it doesn’t mind though
People walk all over me, however I do mind
I don’t admit it much, but I do
Mind
The trees are cut down but not like me cut down
They’re cut to give us paper, firewood, housing materials, things that help keep us going
I am cut down by words of people who need a way to make themselves feel better
I try not to let these things get to me
I try to ignore them
I try not to notice that I’m a little out of the group, like the runt of a litter off to the side
I try to ignore the words of those who are insecure and want to hurt me
But it’s hard because I’m not inanimate.
I change unlike the sky, even when it cries, it’s still blue under the black
I feel unlike the clouds, for they wander aimlessly not needing someone to see them
I hurt unlike the trash, though thrown about will never bleed
I mind unlike the sidewalk, it had no voice to say stop
I scream in pain unlike the trees, for they are cut and can regrow
I am made of flesh and blood and bones, of muscles and hair and life
I am made of emotions and ideas and imagination, of creativity and want and need
I am not inanimate.
I am here and I am me
And I am sad
Because people treat me as less than I am
And those who notice? Say nothing.
This poem is also about:Such a simple word
Love
Such a simple word
Four letters
Two vowels
Two consanants
Love
Such a joyous sensation
The closest a human ever gets to heaven on earth
Paradise in a moment
Perfect in the blink of an eye
Love
The closest a human ever gets to hell on earth
Pain for years
Longing in the truest sense
Love
The ultimate paradox
The essence of irony
The worst and best thing in Life
Love
Such a simple word
Four letters
Two vowels
Two consanants
Love
This poem is also about:If Only
If only I could see you one more time,
Before I had to lose you forever
If only I could hear your voice, one last time,
To let me know I wasn’t gone
If only I could feel you, just once more,
Before you slipped out of my grasp
If only I could tell you, three simple words,
For a final time, before I die
If only I could tell you how much I love you…